Friendship Defined

I write this post for several reasons.  One for venting the other for defining and moving forward.

I consider my friends to be just that " Friends"   there when you need them and on stand by until then.   I consider myself to be a friend to several and used by some.  I am a nurturer in helping people through tough times which is something that gives me joy as I see them come out of the other side with a greater understanding of who they are and what their purpose is.

It is hard for me to call everyone my friend because I have been burnt so many times.   I never if ever ask for help because I don't want the disappointment.  The sad part is the same people I would go get off the side of the road or take them to get food are not not always the ones I would think of that would do for me.  I only wish that all of the positive energy that I put out to others is passed on to someone because they needed it more.  It hurts me when people are just plain mean spirited for the sake of their own insecurities.  They find people like me with a giving spirit and take advantage of it.  Shame on me for not seeing it. but no more...

It is not my place to correct a grown woman for allowing others to use them or take advantage of them unless they ask my advice.  I am a listener until you ask.   Once you ask don't get mad if you don't like what I have to say.  You should know me by now so you really already know what my answer will be.  So don't think you are appeasing me by asking me for advise.  I do not have all of the answers only mine and I have enough to worry about.

Family is just that family.  I did not choose them and I don't deal with them if I don't choose to.  Don't get me wrong, I love my family but every one has drama in theirs and I avoid any and all of it at all cost.  So if I don't go around my family it is because I will not filter my words for grown folks because you are the drama queen/king and you pretend not to be.  I just stay in my lane at my house.  It is not always about what you have accomplished it should be about what our relationship is and how we can stay connected as a family.
Family getting their feeling hurt over petty issues that don't accomplish anything gives me acid reflux.

I can no longer allow myself to be in a place of being used for the good in me and being taken advantage of. I don't know what my tomorrow will bring but I do know what I will expect going forward.

Friendship is something I value.  I think I will re-evaluate my friends.